I hate everyone

There.  I said it.  I hate everyone.

Okay.  Maybe not EVERYONE. But almost everyone. Those I don't hate??? My son, my daughter, my maternal grandma, my younger paternal female cousin and her daughter, my paternal aunts, my maternal aunt and her kids, one of my paternal 3rd female cousins, my boss, my dad(but sometimes i do hate him too), a couple of the sales guys at work....everyone else is fair game for the hate train.

I pulled into the driveway and just started crying.  The actual act of pulling into the driveway and looking at the house caused me to cry.  That and the realization that I may never make it out of here alive.  literally and figuratively.

I'm so sick of being here, but even more sick of complaining about it.  So, I just try not to think about it.  Then someone will ask me what kind of plan I have to get out of here.  And I have no answer.  There is no plan.  There is no money.  There is no hope.  There is no plan.  Its pathetic.

I feel like such a loser.